


I Could Call It

by prince_yogurt



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Airports, Alternate Universe - Normal Life, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mild Language, One Shot, idk???, what is life?????????, what is this?????
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-10
Updated: 2015-09-10
Packaged: 2018-04-20 01:26:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4768349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prince_yogurt/pseuds/prince_yogurt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jongin's come a long way back home but Kyungsoo has to go even further.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Could Call It

**Author's Note:**

> PLS READ THIS: Something may trigger you in this fic but if I put it in the warnings it would spoil the whole thing so it's in the end notes if you'd like to be warned!
> 
> I wrote half of this two years ago then looked at it again and finished the other half in a few hours what even.  
> Bless my betas/pre-posting readers Day of the Week, Danial, Mint Patty, and The Stars In The Night Sky. (If you guys are reading this don't you love your names :)))))) )  
> Without them, this fic would make sense to only 10% of you but now the chances have upped to 80% apparently. So don't think you're dumb if you don't get this fic, because it's kind of hard to follow and you gotta think real hard to get it. I think pay very close attention to the descriptions and wording and time and you might get it?? Sorry on my part for the complexity hhhha.  
> I'll have notes at the end if you don't understand it but want to!!

**i. Fall**

 

\-  11:48PM  -

_“Ladies and gentlemen, the train will now come to a stop,”_ the tinny voice said as the skytrain car screeched slowly to a halt.

Kyungsoo looked up at the circular white speaker emitting the automated female voice from the car’s ceiling. Somewhere to his left he hears a frustrated sigh.

_“We apologize for the temporary delay.”_

Blaring, continuous shrill noises from the street below catch his attention. There are two ambulances, one police car, and one firetruck. Kyungsoo can see a growing throng of people kept in check by police surrounding a scene where EMTs and firefighters are busily rushing about.

_“The train will start up again shortly.”_

Kyungsoo’s eyes travel to the centre of the commotion; his gaze creeps slowly over a black van stopped in the middle of street, its front crashed into the passenger’s seat of a bright yellow taxi. He sees the movement of firefighters prying open the taxi’s doors.

 

He looks away before he can see the bodies being carried out.

 

_“We hope you have a pleasant evening.”_

 

 

\-  11:57PM  -

There isn't any fanfare for Kim Jongin's arrival. There aren't any screams or cheers or calls of "Look over here!" directed towards him from a mob of fans as he passes through the final gate. No, Jongin is a simple guy -- a dog lover and owner of three who has a steady job from which he makes just enough to support his simple yet comfortable lifestyle. He has a few close friends that he keeps in contact with. All in all, he lives a relatively quiet life.

Dragging his small suitcase beside him, Jongin glances up at the sea of faces in the waiting area for arrivals. Expecting to find none that he recognizes, he's surprised when he spots one -- the face of Do Kyungsoo.

"Jongin," the former greets with a poker face, chin buried in the warmth of the collar of his sweater.

" ’Soo?" Jongin asks, eyes wide as he approaches the other man. "What are you doing here?"

"I just thought it would be nice to greet you," Kyungsoo replies, "and to, you know, accompany you back."

Jongin lets that sink in for a moment, realizing that someone came all the way here just to bring him home.

A warm feeling starts in his chest and spreads through him, reaching to the tips of his toes and causing a grin to spread across his face.

"Thanks."

Jongin's smile is radiant to Kyungsoo, whose heart skips a beat at the sight of it.

"It wasn't any trouble."

A silence falls between them, the remnants of a smile ghosting Jongin's lips while Kyungsoo desperately fights the oncoming blush he feels.

(Of course, Jongin doesn't notice this.)

"Let's head home then, shall we?" Kyungsoo suggests, snapping Jongin out of his reverie.

"Mm," he hums while nodding.

The automatic doors whoosh open upon detecting them. A blast of warm air showers the two briefly before they step into the chill of a not-quite-winter's night.

 

 

\-  12:06AM  -

 

In the nearly empty skytrain, the humming and periodic screeching fills the last car of the earliest round. It’s a bit stuffy inside, but Jongin is grateful for the warmth; he can’t stand the cold. To his left, Kyungsoo sits and prattles on about things that have happened in his daily life (such as how one day it was pouring outside but he rushed out of the house so he forgot his umbrella and got soaked and how Baekhyun fit in perfectly with the three dogs and adored them to death) while Jongin was away.

As the older man continues, Jongin notices a young woman sitting across the aisle from him, leaning forward with elbows on her knees hunched over her iPad. His glance wanders to her screen; she seems to be pouring over a news article. Jongin tries to make out the upside-down headline.

_Two Men in Critical Condition After Car Crash: Victims Identified as Abio Berney and-_

“Jongin,” Kyungsoo says, body turned to Jongin’s direction, hand waving up and down in front of his face. “Are you here?”

“Oh, what?” Jongin jerks backward, shaking his head.

“It’s alright. I know you’re pretty worn out from your travels.”

The fatigued man offers a small smile. “Thanks.”

He receives a smile in return.

Kyungsoo continues his constant chattering, settling back into his seat. He faces forward as he goes on, and Jongin does the same.

His eyes land once again on the woman’s iPad, but she’s scrolled down past the article from before. Uninterested in the new article she’s reading, he peers out the window instead and is graced with the full view of buildings upon buildings upon buildings passing by and the night sky and the beautiful star-

_Hm._ Actually, he can’t see the stars.

Jongin thinks that’s a bit weird, considering that it’s a relatively clear night. He figures that it’s his lack of sleep that’s causing him to not see clearly. That isn’t a good sign. Feeling the onset of drowsiness, he lets his eyes close as the swaying of the train and his friend’s deep, soothing voice lulls him to sleep. His muscles unwind and he ends up leaning against the plastic pane to his right.

Kyungsoo senses the other man slowly relaxing and thinks Jongin might be dozing off; with a glance, he confirms his suspicions. His rambling gradually patters to a stop. With a small crooked smile, Kyungsoo glances out the window across from them, which he can fully see out of due to the lack of passengers blocking it.

“Please wait for me just a little longer,” Kyungsoo whispers. He sees the stars. They seem to twinkle back at him in response.

He turns to face the motionless Jongin beside him to make sure that he’s completely asleep. Assured by the endearing sound of soft snoring, he leans in and plants a soft kiss upon the sleeping Jongin’s lips and retreats quickly.

(Kyungsoo awakens before Jongin. He manages to wake Jongin up by gently nudging him as he coaxes him to open his eyes with promises of lots of home cooked food.)

 

 

\-  12:25AM  -

The walk back home is a one which starts off cool and ends up cold.

There’s a strange feeling in the air that Jongin can’t shake off no matter how hard he shivers or rubs his arms to feel warmer.

He ignores it, though. It’s fine as long as Kyungsoo is there-

Wait, what? “ _As long as Kyungsoo is there_ ” sounds like a cheap line from a lovesick teenager.

Gross. Jongin mentally slaps himself.

He almost can’t feel his nose, and he’s sure it, along with his cheeks, are tinted a ruddy pink. Jongin glances over at Kyungsoo.

“Aren’t you cold?” he asks, sniffling.

“No, not really,” Kyungsoo shrugs.

“But you’re only wearing a sweater,” Jongin frowns. “You don’t even have a jacket on and it’s something like five degrees celsius right now.”

Kyungsoo gives him a look.

“I’m just not, okay?”

Jongin squints suspiciously.

“Okay.”

 

 

\-  1:04AM  -

After inhaling a large helping of Kyungsoo’s beef stew, Jongin sits back in his chair.

“Ah, there’s nothing like filling up on good food,” Jongin sighs contentedly.

“Gee,” Kyungsoo snorts, seated next to him, “thanks for the compliment.”

“Hey, I said it was good,” whines Jongin.

“You didn’t say it outright.”

“God, why do I even bother with you?” Jongin sighs.

“More like why do I bother with you,” Kyungsoo retorts.

“That’s because I’m char-”

“Admit it, Jongin,” Kyungsoo interrupts, “you would be found dead in your apartment within two weeks if I wasn’t around to make sure you’re alive.”

Jongin purses his lips and glares hard at Kyungsoo.

“Those daggers you’re glaring at me aren’t going to cut through anything,” the older man hums as he leans forward in his chair.

“You win this round.”

“And all the ones previous,” Kyungsoo affirms.

“God damn it, Kyungsoo,” mumbles Jongin.

“Don’t keep asking God to damn ‘it’, whatever ‘it’ may be,” Kyungsoo says, slightly annoyed. “He doesn’t do that to people.”

“And how would you know this?” Jongin asks snarkily.

Of course, Kyungsoo can’t tell him how.

Tilting his head to see Kyungsoo’s face more clearly, Jongin catches the other man staring at a fixed spot on the floor. “ ‘Soo?” he asks cautiously.

The small voice snaps Kyungsoo out of his thoughts. “I just do, okay?”

“Ha! I win this round, then,” Jongin announces in a sing-song voice.

“Fine,” hisses Kyungsoo begrudgingly.

 _“I just let you,”_ he thinks. _“You wouldn’t even fucking believe me if I told you how.”_

 

 

\-  1:23AM  -

For a while, Kyungsoo watches Jongin’s eyes flutter open and closed as he tries to fight sleep. He thinks Jongin’s lashes are like small butterflies, wings beating hard enough to fly away, always beautiful.

Kyungsoo pokes Jongin in the side. “Hey.”

The poke stirs Jongin from his struggle. “Mmm… Whaa?” Jongin mumbles.

“Don’t fall asleep on me,” Kyungsoo says, nudging Jongin in the side again, this time with his elbow.

“Okay,” Jongin replies lazily as his struggle between awake and asleep continues.

A little irked by this, Kyungsoo huffs a tiny breath of irritation. “Oi.”

“Mmm?” Jongin hums, eyelids half-open.

At this, Kyungsoo snaps. “Fucking hell,” he heaves.

“Shut up,” Jongin pouts. “I just had an eleven hour-long flight, okay?” he muttered sleepily.

“This is important, though,”

“Can’t this wait?”

“No. I need to say it now.”

Although Jongin knows that Kyungsoo is being serious by his tone of voice, he’s just too damn tired to listen.

Despite his exhaustion and wanting nothing more than to close his eyes and fall into a deep blissful sleep, something compels him to force his eyes open for a while longer.

“What is it?” Jongin blinks.

“Uh, oh God, how do I start this…”

Jongin, awaiting a continuation, raises an eyebrow in response.

(Come on, it’s not every day that Do Kyungsoo doesn’t know what to say.)

“Fuck.”

“That’s great. Now, will you kindly let me sleep?”

“No, no. I didn’t mean- I just- Damn it, Jongin. Why the hell do you have to be so difficult?”

“It’s what gets the ladies,” the younger says boastfully, waggling his eyebrows.

“Really,” Kyungsoo deadpanned.

“Yes. Not to mention my manly charm that exudes from my every pore.”

“You’re such a dumba-”

“Did I talk about my blindingly brilliant smile?” Jongin interrupts, flashing a grin.

“Jong-”

“People love my body, too.”

Kyungsoo sighs.

“They always say, ‘Oh, Jongin~ Your muscles are so toned~ Wow, can I touch your abs~?’”

At this point, Kyungsoo decides to stop talking.

This man can go on for hours about his ‘good points’.

As much as he likes the detour in the conversation buying him more time to prepare himself mentally, Kyungsoo hopes it won’t take until then.

(After all, he doesn’t have much time left.)

 

 

\-  1:42AM  -

It surprisingly takes only a few minutes until a wordless pause stretches out.

The rhythmical pattern of breathing fills the space.

“Kyungsoo?” Jongin whispers cautiously, searching Kyungsoo’s paling face for something, _anything_ , to give him a hint as what he’s about to say.

Nothing would have prepared him for the words about to leave those plush lips and worried eyes.

“I like you.”

Another pause.

“What,” Jongin says flatly.

“I said, I like you,” Kyungsoo says more firmly this time.

Jongin looks down at Kyungsoo’s hands, folded neatly in his lap. They’re shaking.

He looks back up to Kyungsoo.

“Are you joking? Because I never thought I’d see the day you initiate a joke.”

Kyungsoo sighs at Jongin’s inability to cope with difficult situations like these.

“I’m not joking, Jongin. I really do like you.”

Kyungsoo swallows.

“I think I could even call it love.”

Jongin stays quiet and averts his eyes to start studying a stain on the table.

Noticing this, Kyungsoo decides to soften his approach so as not to scare off Jongin or worsen his state of denial.

(Come on, it’s not every day that Kim Jongin doesn’t say anything.)

“I’ve liked you since around early high school. Of course, I always gave myself excuses. I would tell myself, ‘It’s only admiration. It’s only close friendship. Nothing more, nothing less.’ For the longest time, I shoved my emotions in a box and hid it in an obscure corner at the back of my mind.”

Kyungsoo takes a deep breath before he continues.

“I thought I was abnormal, Jongin. I thought I was a freak. I would see all types of kids getting beat up on, and not just physically, because they were considered ‘weird’. I was so scared I would end up like them, and that’s why I didn’t want these feelings.”

A fat tear plops onto the table.

“During that time, I… I was sad. I was constantly in pain for a reason I didn’t know of until I confronted it.”

“And when I did realize that I loved you, it was like I finally took my head out from underwater. I could breathe again without choking on my own denial.”

“Hey, uh, Kyungsoo,” interrupts Jongin, eyes wide, “I know this isn’t the best time but, um…”

“What?” Kyungsoo half-sobs.

Jongin flinches at the sound. He feels a hairline fracture run through his heart. “You look a little pale. Or maybe translucent would be a better word? Because I can actually start to see through you.”

The crying man’s blood runs cold.

“What are you-”

Kyungsoo looks down at his hand and sure enough, to his horror, he can start to see the hardwood floor through it.

“Shit,” he breathes. “Jongin I have to go now.”

“But I still have things to say to you-”

“I can’t. Stay. Any longer.” Kyungsoo spells out, trying to swallow down his panic.

“Fuck,” he breathes, eyes closed as he runs fingers through his hair. “I didn’t want you to see me like this.”

“Why-”

“Jongin.” Kyungsoo says, his solemnity catching Jongin off-guard, effectively shutting him up. “I’m sorry for a lot of things, but I’m the most sorry for telling you how I feel only now.”

Kyungsoo gaze softens as he cups Jongin’s face with both hands as gently as one would handle something extremely precious and breakable. Kyungsoo blinks away the remnants of tears as his eyes travel over every curve and angle of Jongin’s face, memorizing it, until they lock with the younger’s. He then quickly plants a soft barely-there kiss on Jongin’s forehead and smiles a little sadly.

Jongin can’t feel Kyungsoo’s touches anymore.

“Be a good boy, okay?” Kyungsoo says in what he tries to pull off as a joking way, ruffling Jongin’s hair.

Meanwhile, in Jongin’s head, his brain has stopped functioning because of an overload of data he can’t seem to process. This incapacitates him to only being able to gape stupidly at Kyungsoo as he walks out the door.

 

 

\-  2:11AM  -

A shocked silence lays heavy in the air. It surrounds Jongin, hands forming out of nothing and wrapping around his throat, choking him into paralysis and causing his throat to close tight. When it finally lets go, Jongin lets out the air he didn’t know he was holding and gulps down oxygen. His chest is heaving and he’s a little disoriented.

How did he end up like this?

“Kyungsoo,” Jongin whispers.

The ticking of a clock responds.

“Kyungsoo?” he calls a little louder, getting up from his seat.

The chair legs scrape against wood flooring.

“Kyungsoo!” he yells.

The echo of his frenzied voice greets him in reply.

Jongin rushes to the front door and jams his feet in his shoes.

“Shit,” he mutters as he turns the knob of his apartment’s door, the cold air smacking him in the face being the least of his worries as he sprints down one side of the complex’s perimeter.

Jongin’s breaths are noisy and ragged but he swears he sees the tail of Kyungsoo’s shirt disappear just around the next corner.

“Wait!” he screams, his legs burning as he takes each step as fast as his legs will allow him to.

But as Jongin turns the corner, he doesn’t see Kyungsoo.

_Kyungsoo is gone._

The realization hits Jongin in the gut and makes him double over, palms on his bent knees, trying to catch his breath from running and the sucker punch dealt to him.

As he stares at the increasingly blurring ground, cold sweat mixes with hot tears to drip something lukewarm to the ground.

And that’s when he sees it.

A single rose falls delicately between his feet, it’s pale pink-centered form gradually fading to white outer petals neither tainted nor deformed by its landing.

Jongin falls to his knees, and scoops it up as gently as one would handle something extremely precious and breakable.

Jongin holds the flower close to his heart as he kneels there, cold enveloping him, harsh breaths condensing and disappearing into the chilled night air.

 ****  


 

**iii. Winter**

 

\-  5:00AM  -

Jongin wakes up to the ringtone of his cell phone.

It hasn’t even been three hours since he stumbled back home and crashed into bed. Who even calls at five AM?

He grabs for it, squinting at the phone’s harsh light assaulting his eyes this early in the morning.

It’s Baekhyun.

“Hello?” Jongin mumbles.

“Oh my God, Jongin!” Baekhyun fires off, dogs barking agitatedly in the background. “Why weren’t you picking up?”

“Uh, you never called me?” Jongin says as he rubs the puffiness of his eyes.

“I called you more than twenty times!” Baekhyun shrieks into the receiver. The barking gets louder.

Jongin pauses.

“I never got your calls,” he replies, suddenly fully awake as he sits up in his bed.

_Why didn’t I wake up?_

“Yeah, well, whatever, that’s the best news so far,” Baekhyun sighs, all the livid energy from before leaving him being replaced with a newfound heaviness.

“News?” Jongin asks, sensing something is wrong.

Baekhyun doesn’t speak.

“Baek,” Jongin asks somberly. He hears a soft sob on the other end.

“He was just on his way to pick you up,” Baekhyun replied, voice trembling. “He was in the taxi when…”

A long shaky inhale.

“There was an accident,” he spluttered out, weeping. “A car crash.

“They- They say they rushed him to the hospital as quickly as they could…”

Jongin tightens his grip on his cellphone.

“They tried their best, Jongin. He was in a coma, but only just three hours ago he, he-”

Another rattling breath.

“Do Kyungsoo is dead.”

 

 

 

**iii. Spring**

 

\-  11:11AM   -

An old man is lying down, body still in his hospital bed except for the rise and fall of his chest. His breaths are shallow yet quiet enough that the dull hum of the television news and beeps of the heart monitor are able to overpower it. The man opens his eyes for what he knows will be the last time.

“I-I’m here”, he whispers.

“I’ll finally be able to meet you again,” he says, then hacks violently.

“And this time,” he breathes calmly, eyes closing, “I’ll be able to properly tell you.

“Everything.”

The heart monitor beeps stop completely, its rhythm replaced by a single long screech.

A flurry of nurses, doctors, and family are rushing into and out of the room, noises crashing and coalescing into a cacophony of rattling metal, swishing sheets, and wails.

No one notices the old man’s most prized possession, the unassuming pink-white rose encased in a glass cube by his bedside.

No one notices that the flower inside is now gone.

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: major character deaths
> 
> Also, the tea rose symbolizes "I will always remember".
> 
> K quick timeline (for clarification purposes):  
> -kyungsoo is on his way to pick up jongin at the airport via taxi but they get into a crash  
> -kyungsoo goes into a coma and his spirit makes its way to jongin instead (because he's got a lot to say to him and also wanted to see him before he had to go pass on to the other side aka die)  
> -kyungsoo meets up with jongin, the rest of the shit happens, skip forward and then  
> -while they're having such emotional conversation kyungsoo starts to fade and that's signalling him that his time is up and he is going to die in his coma soon but he doesn't want to disappear in front of jongin because that would break his heart so he runs  
> -run run run flower crying  
> -ok so this skips to when jongin was asleep after he basically dragged himself home after the flower thing and baek calls him and shit goes downnnnn (also kyungsoo's spirit probs was the reason jongin didn't wake up maybe kyungsoo made sure he wouldn't hear his phone ringing so jongin wouldn't rush over to the hospital he was being held in and see how badly broken his body was from the crash idk)  
> -the old guy at the end is old jongin and the flower disappearing means something like jongin has joined kyungsoo and the flower isn't needed to remember him anymore i don't really know but its symbolism of some sort hah  
> -end
> 
> Thanks for reading! ^^


End file.
